This is for all those who at one point in their lives have enjoyed a healthy sex life. Perhaps it was at the beginning of a relationship and the sex drive was high. Anytime and every time was a good time to have a good time.😄 But now, not so much! The truth is that changes in libido are common and affect all genders. It’s affected by a combination of physical, emotional, psychological and relationship circumstances.
A drop or decline in libido can cause worry, especially when you notice what seems like a dramatic drop. But here are a number of ways you can get help!
First of all, what’s libido anyways?
Libido is just another word for sex drive or the desire for sex. It varies from one person to the next and also depends on a person’s preferences and life circumstances. For example, a busy life can leave some people too tired or preoccupied to even think about sex. A new couple at the beginning of their relationship is likely to experience a high sex drive which is more likely to decline with time. These are just but a few reasons to explain the varying changes.
What is a ‘normal’ libido?
There is no normal when it comes to libido! We are all different. Some people have sex or feel like having sex, every day, others may have sex after weeks or months and others even once a year or not at all. It all depends on what you prefer and your life circumstances. The best way to know if your libido is not ‘normal’ for you is by truly learning more about yourself and understanding your body. In simple terms, only you would know if you are experiencing a decrease in libido!
What would cause low libido?
Medical conditions, relationship issues and side effects from medications are all general causes of lowered libido but some other causes include:
Depression – It can cause tiredness, lack of motivation, feeling sad and withdrawal from activities, including sex
Stress – researchers have found stress hormones can lessen sexual desire and response
Exercise and physical activity – either too much or too little physical activity can cause a loss of sex drive
Lack of time and privacy – Work and home life may not leave enough time for intimacy and sex
Fatigue – feeling too tired for sex is common and one of the leading factors to a decrease in libido
Past traumatic experience – Going through trauma such as sexual harassment, sexual abuse or rape, can impact sexual desire
Familiarity – A couple’s desire for sex tends to lessen over time
Sexual incompatibility – If a person constantly wants more sex than their partner or wants a type of sexual activity that their partner is not comfortable with
What health issues would affect libido?
There are some medical conditions that are known to affect a woman’s libido. These are:
Infections – Such as thrush or urinary tract infections (UTI)
Dyspareunia – Experiencing painful sex
Pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding – Because of changes in hormone levels, especially the hormone prolactin
Vaginismus – The involuntary (not under your conscious control) clamping or spasm of the vaginal muscles, making penetration difficult, if not impossible
Problems reaching orgasm – Cannot reach orgasm or reach it within the time wanted by either you or your partner.
Menopause – Because of the drop in sex hormones
Tips on how to boost libido
Now to the part, you have all been waiting for. If you are looking to spice up your sex life and improve your libido here are a few natural ways to go about it:
Eat certain foods - Figs, bananas, and avocados, for example, are considered libido-boosting foods, or aphrodisiacs. Adding herbs like basil and garlic to your dish can also stimulate the senses and increase blood flow. Chocolate also promotes the release of the chemicals that offer some aphrodisiac and mood-lifting effects
Exercise - A healthy lifestyle that involves exercise is not just important for your heart and muscles but also for a healthy sex drive. Remember, blood flows to your genitals as much as to your heart.
Get enough sleep - Hormone secretion is controlled by the body’s internal clock, and sleep patterns likely help the body determine when to release certain hormones related to sex.
Relieve stress - Being stressed out can affect your sex drive. To relieve stress, consider meditation, therapeutic activities, mindfulness or yoga.
Get in the mood - Prioritize getting in the mood for sex by either availing time, removing distractions and of course foreplay
Communicate - it is important to communicate to improve the overall quality of the relationship and resolve issues that could lead to tension. it also helps to learn how to increase intimacy and physical affection without having sex.
It’s normal for your libido to change at some point and the good news is there are a couple of things you can do to improve it. It helps to have an idea of what could be causing the drop in your sex drive that way you know how to resolve the issue. However, remember that all couples are different and it may require a lot more experimentation for you to finally find something that works.
Stay informed, stay in control Did you learn something today?